The Longest Day That Has Ever Been

Whenever I confess to my boss that I am bone tired, like I am today, she always asks, in a tone worthy of an interrobang, "Are you pregnant?!"

The answer, unless my sweet NuvaRing has let me down, is a resounding, "NO." Knock on wood.

But the fact remains that I have achieved a state of profound lethargy and mental dullness that began its onset 'round lunchtime, when I began sorting three years' worth of my union's financial paperwork into some semblance of chronological order. I followed that up with even more tedious crap that I can't bring myself to describe, lest my brain actually shrivel up and fall out of my ear. I can only hope that the evening will bring with it a raft of hedonistic pleasures.

Sadly, my plans so far seem to be the gym and a delicious dish called "Arabian Spinach," that I will whip up for myself and the Manfriend in a frenzy of domestic bliss. Later, we'll wild out with a bottle of wine and a game of Scrabble, followed by a nightcap of Ensure and prunes, and the mutual plucking of gray pubes. Old age has never looked so good!

To your health!
No, to our health!